Pre-judgement zone at the Gym

Your biggest eyes have been used to assume the worst in others” -Shay-lon Moss

Gym 1

So for the past couple of days or so, i have been trying really hard to post different topics on each blog site because I thought that was the “way to go” but then I realized, its probably not the best option because not everyone uses other blogging sites.  For those of you who do not already know this, I have a tumblr, wordpress and google blogger account and so I realized not everyone has each of these like I do so not everyone can see what I post if I post something different on all of them, I want to make it easier for all of you & make my new goal copying all my post from each site onto one another so that EVERYONE sees EVERYTHING. If you do have all three of these or 2/3 of these and follow me.. I will still try to make one of them more or less different if I can but I am focusing on making them all the same so no one misses out.  Below I will post what I posted yesterday on my google blogger & both of them are on tumblr as we speak.

“When one steps inside the gym, he looks to see who is watching”

 

Today I want to talk about “gym judgement”.  For those of you who may not have heard of this phrase it’s because I just made it up.  Gym judgement is when you assume why someone attends the gym, why someone has the body they have, making light of someones bad form but not helping them correct it, making light of your body when know its better than someone else’s, laughing at someone who doesn’t lift as much as you do, making sure eyes are on you when you workout because you want to show off and prejudging everyone in the gym. Guess why I am speaking on this particular topic? because it happens & I have witnessed it the past 3-4 days now at my gym. Now before someone decides to say “everybody passes gym judgement” , you are correct but not everyone does it the same way.  Gym judgement can also be a good thing when it’s used positively.  Which I will explain.

 

Negative gym judgement examples:

 
  • she has cellulite
  • she shouldn’t wear leggings while working out because her legs are flabby
  • who walks the treadmill? seriously.
  • grandma needs to stay home because she obviously can’t move worth a shit
  • this guy is only lifting ______ pounds.. what a joke
  • he/she has bad form, they shouldn’t use the machine if they can’t use it properly
  • he/she comes here everyday, but still manages to be fat
  • that chick is super skinny, she should probably gain some muscle.
  • omg, who wears that to a gym..
  • wearing clothes that show more skin than necessary
  • drawing attention to yourself because you know you “look good”
  • lifting more weight than necessary but not able to use correct form/technique

Now some of these are verbal and others are non verbal ques of gym judgement. It’s making a conscious decision to make light of other people’s flaws while they workout & to puff your head up while you workout to make others around you feel intimidated or uncomfortable.  Its become apparent to me, that three men at my gym have made it pretty clear they enjoy gym judging people.  Actually they say much worse about the people, then I stated above but I choose to not type those words out. Normally their victims are elderly, young girls, young guys, anyone who seems “weak”, “ugly”, or overweight or vulnerable. These three men don’t make light out loud of course but they say things where I can usually hear it if I am near them or enough to make the person walk away & ignore them.  Mind you these men are middle aged men, probably late 30s early 40s.. and its really ridiculous they come to the gym to workout and ridicule others.

 

Positive gym judgement example:

  • Helping someone fix their form/technique and explaining to them why
  • complimenting someone on how well they are doing
  • Taking the time to realize everyone goes to the gym for the same reasons: to workout
  • Wearing appropriate clothing that doesn’t have to show your assets to make a point
  • staying humble but confident enough to do your workout and feel good
  • lifting weight that you know you can lift without destroying your form/technique
  • learning from someone else how to do a certain exercise
  • talking to fellow gym members to understand their reasoning for wanting to workout
  • have a positive attitude
  • don’t compete to show off
  • keep your jokes about people’s appearance to yourself and do not make light of it.
  • ask yourself if that was your grandma would you want someone to talk to her like that? if that was your mom or sister or brother, would you want people to laugh at them?

Again these might not all be something you are interested in, but these are positive ways to attend a gym and get the most out of them. Some of the negatives are also another form of body shaming, and its sad because people want to come to the gym to improve, gain confidence, feel good, socialize, to “get away”, lose weight, gain muscle.  The gym can be someones safe haven but when people tear people down instead of uplifting them, it makes it harder for people to want to go.  I know females can be quite harsh toward other females; when it comes to body and appearance but it needs to stop because at some point you might hit an ultimate low point in your life and trust me you will not want someone to continually tear you down.

 

Maybe some of you may know someone who is negative when they attend the gym or people who make light of others flaws instead of helping them, maybe you are one of these types of people yourself.  We all judge people, I do know this, even I do on a daily basis. but when I pass judgement at the gym, most likely I also try to help that person or put myself in their shoes because I have no idea how that person may feel or handle it, not to mention I never want someone to ever feel uncomfortable around me or intimidated. As for the three men at the gym who seem to enjoy passing negative judgement toward others at the gym, I plan on saying something to them if I hear of it again.

 

All-in-all just be aware of your mindset when you attend a gym and see people of all body types and training levels, keep in mind some people may struggle and that’s when you help and show them the way or maybe find someone who can or just ignore it and focus on yourself if you don’t care. Either way, just make sure you keep your mind open and comments to yourself if you have to be negative.

Thank you for reading, comment, like, follow and share.

 

Sincerely,

Your blogger Shay-lon

Motivation. Who has it?

The lack of motivation happens when you decide it’s someone else’s job to make you do something” -Shay-lon Moss

Motivation: The act or an instance of motivating or providing with a reason to act in a certain way.

What motivates you? Who motivates you? & Why? Well these are the questions one should ask themselves; especially those of you who do feel motivated because chances are if you have no motivation you won’t be able to answer these questions. Let start with myself for an example.

Just an FYI, this is still based around fitness,health, and overall wellness which you will soon learn how.  

  1. I feel motivated to stay in shape, eat healthier when I think of the fact that I want to be a personal trainer, going to school for exercise science and know a few people who look up to me and want my help to make them feel better about themselves. I feel motivated when I see the obesity rates go up, when schools get rid of P.E classes, when  I think of my overall goal of wanting to be a fitness mogul of some type that helps people worldwide with how they feel and look & teach people to look at fitness in a different way. I feel motivated when I am challenged, debated, and questioned about my interest in fitness and health.  I feel most motivated when I look at myself in the mirror and realize how far I’ve come and how proud I am to be where I am now with my health and fitness. ( I hit a rough spot with my weight for a while) 
  2. Quite honestly I have learned to motivate myself but when I need support I have a few friends who also keep me motivated, I have my siblings who motivate me to want to be the best I can be.
  3. Why do I feel motivated by these things because I know all of these things play a factor in who I am today and my decisions I have made that go along with staying fit and healthy and helping others. 

Fitness and motivation go hand in hand when it comes to wanting the best for yourself.  The reason being is because if you lack any sort of motivation, you will most likely give up.  This is why you see people quit when they don’t see results, stop running before hitting the finish line, stop walking everyday to work instead taking their cars, stop eating healthy, stop worrying about their health because these people gave up and these people gave up because they had no motivation.  For some of you who are motivated, whatever motivates you is the same thing someone else may need to motivate them.  For those of you who don’t feel motivated, I am here to get you started because I want to guide you toward a positive mindset so that your motivation is internal like mine but if you run out internal motivation you still have the support of others.  The goal is to do things for YOU and not for someone else.  The end result of motivation is YOU have to want it, because someone else wanting it isn’t going to keep you moving for very long.  Trust me.  I am going to give you some steps to get started on motivating self.. 

  1. Say I can.
  2. Say I will.
  3. Say Today I start, tomorrow I continue
  4. Start small, grow big (small goals, big dreams)
  5. Fuel your inner self (build self confidence, positive thoughts)

When I think about these basic steps, I realize they seem so simple, but actually this will be a battle with yourself, this will test your determination, will power, and inner strength. You will fail, you will fall, you will feel weak, you will crack, you will feel defeated and lose hope; because of all that you will come out more motivated than ever.  I challenge everyone of you to take these steps and use them.  I promise it will take time & the road will be rough but once you reach the point where you can self motivate yourself, then you will be able to motivate others and then they will in return reach their internal motivation. Using motivation from others consist of:

  1. Talking to likeminded people
  2. Support them and they will support you
  3. share your achievements with peers
  4. post your achievements on social media

Both kinds of motivation are very good & no matter what, you should always know I will be your # 1  fan cheering you on and supporting you as you go through this journey of fitness and health. If you need to know who is here to back you up when you fall, I’ll be that person. If you need to know who you can brag to when you feel like you conquered a hurdle, I’ll be that person. When you need someone to cry to because you fell and thought you couldn’t get back up, I’ll be there to make sure both your legs are working (metaphorically speaking), when the rain pours, I’ll be your umbrella & when all odds are against you, I’ll fight with you.  I’ll be your external motivation & your friend through this. Take my hand & lets get started!  Thank you for reading, Feel free to comment, share, like and follow me. I appreciate all my followers now and I hope I have inspired some of you to take lead with me and allow me to help you feel like the best person you can be. 

Sincerely, 

Your Blogger Shay-lon

 

 

 

Your Strength

“Don’t Stop picking up the bar because you can’t lift it, keep trying because one day it will be the reason you fight harder” =Shay-lon Moss

Fitness

Okay so today, will be quick & painless. I just started a tumblr account & some of you might know what it is and others may not.  For the ones who are not aware of this site ; it’s another blogging site but much more hip.  I was exploring this site & trying to figure out how to use it, I finally figured it all out to say the least it took me a good 30 minutes.  I started messaging people right away to get an idea of what they post about fitness and how they get so many followers.  For right now, I have only received one message back and she told me “Motivation and beating their cravings” is the way to attract people to your blog.  I was a bit confused because It seems to easy to talk about. Well, I decided I would go along with it for now but I am still going to blog about what I would on this site and google blogger. Today’s post is about motivation, and actually I plan on talking about this more tomorrow because I am running low on time.  

I just want feedback today & hopefully some good ideas that motivate you.  I know this sounds crazy and all, but I want to be able to motivate people whom have a great deal of problems keeping them from motivating themselves.  So yes share, comment, like and follow and get back with me. If I don’t hear anything from anyone, I’ll just write tomorrow on reasons why people lack motivation and what I can do to help you stay motivated. 

Sincerely, 

Your Blogger Shay-lon Moss

Selfie first?

Selfie damage

Selfie 2

Selfie- A photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone, or webcam and shared via social media.

 

The selfie; duck lips, body pics, friend pics, smile pics.  It is notorious for having the same person in all the pictures; ourselves.  It has taken over social media, was made into a song, created to be a tool,  now its the way we see ourselves in the mirror. Who needs a mirror when you have phone & an audience ready to give you the “okay” on how you look.  Does anyone not know how to take a selfie and share it with all their peers, or is that an automatic thought.  Between the selfie stick and our music this generation may be doomed.  

 

I have taken selfies, as a matter of fact, I can almost guarantee all my pictures in my phone are based around selfies & the minority are the ones I have taken without me in it.  I am not against picture taking, of course not; I love art & everything that comes with it, but the minute we decided to use duck lips was when I realized this was going to be another fad we follow that dies.  I had someone share something with me that I decided to look into more & inquire about because it went along with my “body shaming” topic and also made sense as to how the mind works. 

 

This particular person threw a curve ball at me saying “taking selfies causes more problems then it does curing them”. I had to ponder on this for a bit to give myself understanding about what this person was telling me.  Finally after a while, I decided I would talk about this with all of you and share my personal opinion & maybe share some interest and facts about this Selfie lifestyle. People take selfies for many reasons:

 
 
  • For self gratification
  • show off new clothes,
  • body image
  • celebrations with peers
  • advice
  • social media
  • self hate
  • funny faces
  • snapchat

Some reasons are better than others and have more meaning. Taking a closer look into things, I have researched information that follows: most people take these pictures to be accepted.  Take this how you want to, and believe what you want to believe but do think about this for a second because it kinda makes sense in this day and time.  For young people, nothing is better than having someone compliment you and prove their like for you than to like something you posted about yourself.  Outer appearance makes the world go round and is the difference between being “beautiful” and ” “ugly” (which sucks) unfortunately this also means in order to take these pictures and have a decent amount of fans, sometimes you have to explore all your options and risk more. I have noticed on my facebook, if you don’t have filters more than likely your natural look gets less likes & less likes= less people who think you are pretty/attractive and when people don’t think you are attractive that means=you feel ugly. 

 

This is the perfect equation for selfies. More likes= more attractive, more attractive=more attention, more attention=more fans, more fans= possible friends, more friends= popularity, popularity=self gratification, more self gratification=narcissism & at some point someone will disagree and say self gratification= more confidence, more confidence= more self esteem, more self esteem= happier, more happy= the higher chance of a better life? Either way, the end result only benefits yourself; which in the end means self absorbed because you’re thinking only about you. This is supposedly the good about selfies. 

 

Lets talk about the bad. Less likes/no likes= less attractive or not attractive, not attractive/less attractive= less fans, less fans/no fans= less possibility of making friends, less/no friends= loser/not popular, not popular/loser=no gratification, no gratification=no self confidence, no self confidence=low self esteem, low self esteem= negative thoughts, negative thoughts=self harm, self harm= possibility of death and/or hospitalization. 

 

So now you are sitting here thinking, what are the chances of someone caring enough of what others think? why would someone post pictures to for “likes”?  The ” I don’t care what others think” attitude starts to come through to hopefully make you feel better about yourself. WHICH FAILS, because in the end you can’t let go of the fact you only received 10 likes versus the next girl/guy who always manages to get 100+ likes/followers. I just want to know what part of this people don’t understand. Selfies aren’t a bad thing.. sure.. until something bad happens and makes you rethink your pictures and how you respond to comments. 

 

So when we breakdown all the uses for selfies, we come up with no matter what it is for self & the problem with self, is we don’t have anyone who is willing to think about someone else if it means they have to win this competition of most followers, most likes, prettiest pictures, most filters used.,ect. This game of who can take the best selfies is just a game that should be kept as fun instead of making it into a gigantic ball of favoritism. Who cares if you have 200 friends on facebook versus the 5,000 of someone else who knows only 200 of them. Let the truth be told, your picture is no less beautiful because you didn’t get all the “barbie and ken” dolls on board. I have to admit this, I have NEVER had more than 30 likes on a picture.. & more than 100 followers on instagram and my twitter account just proves my relevance in this community; haha ( I don’t take any of these sites damn serious) because when I take pictures they are in my phone and I don’t feel the need to post them for extra exposure all the damn time. Sometimes I like being able to laugh at the chick who has 100+ likes because she had to show her cleavage to do so.. & her pretend “I just left the gym picture” that proves her vain mindset knowing damn well she never touched the gym in her life just wants a reason to show off her body in her leggings..

 

Now don’t get wrong, I am a pretty girl. I have no issue showing off my body either.. trust me. I could work extra hard and take selfies of every aspect of my life and routine to gain exposure and be accepted, but I choose not to because I don’t have the time on my hands to do so and I prefer the “every once in a great” while take a picture of me with my friends. I use snapchat but I don’t care how I look when I’m sending my friends a snap; they have seen me enough times during the good and bad to know I am not perfect. I don’t need someone to give me the “thumbs up” on how I look, I decide that for myself; I don’t need my “head blown” up or a confidence boost. If I want someone’s opinion, I’ll ask for it. Now for those of you who have high expectations of yourself and your photos, kudos for you. Drive yourself mad, and question your beauty, not my problem.  Just make sure to keep your self righteous opinions of others to yourself. I would highly appreciate it.  

 

A selfie doesn’t make you any prettier on the inside”  -Shay-lon Moss

 

Thank you for reading, please comment, share, follow, and like.  

 

Sincerely,

Your Blogger Shay-lon

Star Wars Actress Attacked- Carrie Fisher

starwars

Star Wars Attack

Star Wars Actress asked to lose 35 pounds

So as we are all aware, the actress who has played “Princess Leia” for the past decade & just recently was also in the newest Star Wars movie has been attacked about her weight; not to mention her age. For those of you who may not know whom this icon is, she is Carrie Fisher. Carrie Fisher has been a legend since the very first Star Wars movie appeared in 1977; she played Princess leia and is known for her beauty and well spoken words on camera.
 
For many, this movie meant so much and stood for so much & brought out the inner kid.  Unfortunately it seems as though some people didn’t like the idea of “Princess Leia” being older, and not so “thin” in their opinion.  People forgot she is not the same person she was YEARS ago, when she was just starting out and young. Some of you, don’t understand how rare it is for such an icon to still be able to do well on screen & manage to hold their character over so many years.  This is a good example of why body shaming is a problem.
 
It seems no one can watch a movie without passing judgement on someone’s body, and or age.  It becomes problematic for those who have grown up watching Star Wars and want to “relive” their childhood dreams.  Why do people have the right to judge someone because of how they look? Who gives us the right to decide how “fat” or “skinny” someone is? Every since when do we have a right to decide what she does with her body & how she carries herself? Freedom of speech gives us a right to an opinion but our opinion shouldn’t be used to bash someone else if they are doing their job by being the best they can be.  This no doubt has played a huge part in the media the past couple of days & the actress seems to be handling the critics well; holding her dignity high, saying what is on her mind and not succumbing to her fans over analyzation of her.  The expectations that we hold on others is quite disturbing to say the least when no one takes time to look at themselves in the mirror and fix that.
 
If anything this shows the lack of happiness in those people’s lives & maybe some of them are insecure with themselves and aim to target others for self gratification. If I am wrong, it could also be the fact we have no filter and choose to express our opinions loudly in hopes it causes some kind of uproar. I would like to think this issue wouldn’t have made a difference in the movie, but it seems like it has for fans and media alike. I wish we wouldn’t be so vain, and aim to criticize petty things that have no effect on our own lives. For the sake of this country, if an actor being “overweight” is going to keep you from enjoying a movie, please feel free to not watch (although in my opinion she looked just fine, and did well throughout the movie) me not being a Star Wars fan.  All-in-all make it a point to keep your negativity to yourself or low key because you may never know when a day comes and someone is not satisfied with the way you look & will pass judgement on you.
 
P.S I have one more topic to talk about below about this same thing.
 
She was asked to lose weight for the sake of the movie, and I call it bullshit. She is forced to lose weight because no one wants to give up their thoughts of the young Carrie Fisher, media is sitting on their high horse once again to appease people that are vain, incompetent and very superficial. We the people who enjoy movies for the movie and good acting could careless about how she looks as long as she remembers her script.  Yes, its true, its an actors job to look the part; but keep in mind she is older than most actors today & this makes a difference in her muscle mass, weight, changes in facial, and hundreds of other things that could forbid her to look like the “young Princess Leia” , take in consideration the fact she is still able to do her part well & entertain the new generation the way she could years back. She did her job, leave her be.
 
Sincerely,
Your Blogger Shay-lon
%d bloggers like this: